The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
