Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
