is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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