I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
