miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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