I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
