Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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