chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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