then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
