Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
honey bunches of taint.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize