i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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