Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I just found a bag of teeth...
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
