i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
