yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
