someone get that fucking seahorse.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
