You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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