Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Be still, my beating vagina.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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