was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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