I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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