why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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