Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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