i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
