So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
