I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize