there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
