I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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