found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
