When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
