I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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