I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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