i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
