is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize