if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
