Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
