Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
