I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
