At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
there was a trapeze. enough said
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
