just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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