Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
