Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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