:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Help. Why am I so naked?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
