8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
