I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
