Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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