quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just forgot I was standing up.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
