just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
