the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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