I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
