Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
