i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
